Thursday, February 11, 2010

Do I Always Have to Prove Myself?

I have been thinking a great deal about proving myself in life...and why I sometimes feel the need to prove myself to some people because of their judgements of me.

It seems like no matter how long I am someone, or do something, or think a certain way, or feel a certain way, I sometimes still feel pressured to prove these things about myself to others.

Take my job for April, I will have been an employee at my company for 7 years...For almost 7 years I have dedicated myself to my company, just as I do with anything I take on in life, and I have worked hard. Most of the time, my colleagues make me feel appreciated, valued, trusted, and genuinely liked. However, I don't always get this vibe from my colleagues (usually 'newer' colleagues)...I don't know if it is because I work from home and am not in the office like a 'regular' employee, but regardless of why it happens, it does happen and will probably happen again sometime in the future.

However, I was really 'hurt' the first time this was actually close to when I first started blogging last October (I blogged about it here). That post wasn't about proving myself, because at the time I didn't realize that was what I was trying to do, but it is definitely relative to this long-winded-post.

As I look back on that incident, and others incidents that have occurred since then, I have realized I DON'T have to prove myself to anyone!!! That all I have to do is be consistent in WHOEVER I want to be and who I want others to KNOW I am. If I do this, even then those who question who I am will eventually see ME for themselves, just like that 'new colleague' of mine did!

Therefore, the answer to my own questions is NO, I don't have to prove myself, I just have to BE myself consistently!

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