I can focus on the positive...

Ok, so as if my post yesterday didn't reflect enough confusion...I am even more confused today.

My biggest fear in life is losing a child.  My heart truly breaks for those who have lost children.  My heart is breaking now for someone I know who just lost a child.

My heart is breaking all over the place and I just can't figure some things out.

However, for roughly the last 24 hours, I have had spent time with the youngest daughter of my dearly, loved best friend who passed away...and the time I have spent with her has been so amazing.  We looked at pictures, some of which had her mom in them and some of which were actually taken by her mom.  She didn't cry at all...she actually smiled quite a few times as we reminisced...all the while, I tried my best to hold back tears.

So, today, I am going to focus on the smile of a child who lost her mother just 8 months ago...for, if she can smile today, then I should, too...though, in times like this, it's definitely hard to do.

Today, I accept that I can't understand or fix everything...but, I can try my hardest to focus on the positive, which today, happens to be the smile of a beautiful 8 year old girl.